>	Blog entries about: nudity

Big Martin and the nightswimming crew.

There was a bit of humming and hawing about the validity of the exercise but all in all it was pretty enjoyable in a number of ways.
1. It turns out it was the first time Foxy has nightswum sober and with togs.
2. Conor was stung 3 times by the same jellyfish (which of course he did not see - but was no doubt attracted to him by the mission impossible style "nightstick" that was attached to the back of his goggles).
3. The comedy sound of a group of girls that you cant see chattering and giggling out in the see…some things never change.

On a serious note, the only thing that you can see when you are swimming at night are the bubbles leaving your mouth and around your hand (and your hand obviously), you could be in 3 feet of water or 300 feet and you are none the wiser, there could be eels or jelly fish right beside you and you are blind to it. In that sense you can just focus on the swimming - you cant worry about things that you cant see. Jellyfish generally are fairly disturbing creatures and if you hit a batch of them you really want to alter your course…but at night…what can you do?

I'm starting a study that will monitor build up of gas in the human body after swimming. It seems clear that after swimming the body is compelled to expel air at a higher rate than when swimming has not occurred. Perhaps it has something to do with the way one breathes whilst swimming?
Comments welcome.

You might say when there’s no underbrush, the tree looks taller…

This may be of interest to the swimmers looking to gain that 2%.

Trim that bush [youtube]

Try a tri (& Medals)

CJ (neé Elvis) and I (formerly Wolf) did a triathlon at the weekend, the Portlaoise Try-athlon. It was a sprint, so that's a 750m swim, 20k cycle and 5k run. We had registered in the competent swim category (12 - 15 minutes), so I was in wave 7, CJ in wave 8. The net effect of this was sitting. Sitting for hours (4 of them) as people did the backstroke, breaststroke and not-dying-substroke to get from one end of the pool to the other 30 times.

When I got in I acquitted myself nicely at 14 and a half minutes. I'd have been faster except for the goon in front of me who wouldn't get out of the way. On to transition (3 mins), a quick flash for the crowd as I dispensed with my togs, and off for my cycle. Since the beginning of the year I had done 9.77km (total) cycling. This was a mistake. The bike ride was not great, either physically or psychologically. Folk passing me out, cramp in my left calve, general misery. 51 minutes, and a resolution to cycle more before the next one. I met CJ on his way out, he was at the 5k mark, I was at the 15k mark. Back into Porlaoise where the traffic was backed up, went on the outside of the queue and then the inside trying not to die.

Back to transition, 38 secs, and out for the run. Legs like lead. Met CJ at the 4k/1k mark. 5k in 27 minutes, slow enough for me, but happy enough after the cycle. A total time of 1hr37mins. A PB (obviously), and a benchmark for the next one

And I got a medal.

I was talking to Al (heretofore 'The Ace') about this, and he was saying that he never got any medals for races that he has been in. Needless to say I was horrified. What the hell is the point if you don't get medals? The medal for the tri was pretty shit (in comparison to the Mooathon cow medal) but that's not the point. Screw personal achievement, if there isn't a piece of anonymous compound metal at the end, I'm not interested. Now, it could be that he just never went looking for the medals after his races, but he was certain that the swim races have no medals. What's that about? Jesus guys! Pull the finger out. I have a shoebox that I have to put these things into.

I am now worried that I won't get a medal after the channel swim. This really puts the whole thing in jeopardy for me. What I am supposed to wear into work after I do it? Huh? A grin? My clothes? My knowledge of what I did? No way man! I am going to mail the CSA to find out, I'll let you know what they say.

Changing room etiquette

Is there a bit of a mystery surrounding changing rooms and their setup?

It seems that the ladies changing rooms typically have "Doored" showers compared with the communal efforts over in the mens and I got to wondering why this is.

You will be disappointed to find out that neither I nor her indoors have any definitive answers on this.

Could it be some kind of personal grooming issue? It would certainly cause some degree of controversy if someone was sporting a back, sack and crack!

Would that really be noticed in the realms of the mens changing room?

On googling "changing room etiquette" or "locker room etiquette" one finds that it is a very virulent interweb topic with do's and donts for those who "fear" the changing room and its environs.

Its clear though that in the case of both sexes there are always some locker room freaks (although it should be pointed out that these peacock types seem to be more of a "Globogym" rather than an "Average Joe's" phenomenon). Although you would have to ask yourself…if there were hairdryers in the mens (or indeed ladies) changing room in irish life, would people be drying their bodies with them…and how far would they go?

This has come to mind recently as I purchased myself a chamois style "sports towel" [http://www.speedo.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/Product6_10151_10202_120562_-1_42308_33314_Y_120565].

The upside of this superb invention is that you are liberated from the shackles of the daily bag routine. You no longer have to wash/dry/bring a towel in every day. The downside of this is that it is the size of a handkerchief.

So….you get out of the pool…stroll over to your bag…pick up your lime shower gel (what?!!) and your sports towel…and stroll into the shower.

Now all this is fine and dandy if you are in the showers at an unpopular time (there are 4 showers in the mens, 2 on 2 facing one another). However, when the showers are busy and there are a lot of humans doing their thing then guess who the freak is? That’s right…it’s the guy with the handkerchief sized towel and the lime shower gel.

So you remove togs, rinse them, wash yourself (thoroughly of course), only then do you really become the freak show. Why you might well ask? Well you have to dry yourself with this item in a sort of rub and sqeeze type of methodology, the chamois, you see, is ultra absorbant so you dry your hair then you wring the towel dry, you dry your muscled hairless torso, then you wring the towel dry, you get the picture (clearly you methodically move down your body from the top to prevent already dried parts of your body becoming wet due to the law of gravity).

Then of course you leave the shower area and return to your clothes, but again you just look like the freak walking around the changing room in his birthday suit (when clearly you are the one who is being the greenest, what with electrical and washing powder saving). So stop with your judging and save the planet, if you are swimming every day then buy the sports towel (available in arnotts).

Not sure how well they would go down in the ladies changing rooms…I'm sure though, that they are just as ecologically aware and friendly as us men (comments welcome).

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